When Life Fell Apart, I Remembered the Rule I Made at 14

I’ve always tried to be a man of my word when it comes to other people, so why wouldn’t I be a man of my word with myself?

When I began my fitness journey at the age of fourteen, I established clear rules and guidelines to help me achieve one major goal: significant weight loss. I was morbidly obese, and after being told by doctors that there was no medical condition contributing to my weight or weight gain, I realized that the responsibility was entirely mine. No ifs, no buts, no excuses. That realization became the catalyst for a complete transformation of my life and habits.

I dramatically cut my food intake—perhaps too drastically in hindsight. I ran on the treadmill in my living room for thirty minutes every single day, no matter what. I created a set of personal rules that I had to follow. I didn’t write them down, but I lived by them. I didn’t even have a specific target weight in mind; I just knew I had a long way to go, and the rules I put in place acting as a sort of structure were what helped me stay consistent, focused, and on track.

Now, almost two decades later and approaching my mid-thirties, life has changed in many ways. Like many adults navigating shifting responsibilities and challenges, I’ve noticed my discipline starting to slip. My sleep schedule is inconsistent, and anyone who understands health, fitness, and wellness knows how critical quality sleep is to recovery, physical performance, and mental clarity. My strength has declined, which can feel somewhat demotivating at times, but usually it is my discipline that keeps me grounded in my fitness routine and good habits.

Lately, I’ve been reflecting on my fourteen years old self and what it was that kept my mindset so strong. I kept returning to one simple principle: being a man of my word. That was a big part of the foundation of my self-accountability. If I committed to something, whether it was exercising, clean eating, or rules I made for myself, I had to follow through. It was how I held myself accountable for my actions. I always strived to be a man of my word when it came to others, so why would I allow myself to break promises to myself?

Being honest with myself and holding myself to account meant no room for excuses. I couldn’t rationalize skipping a workout or falling back into unhealthy habits. It meant that when I made a commitment even if it was silently to myself, I had to honor it, simply because I was being true to my word. If I told myself I would run for 30 minutes, I had to do it. If I said I wouldn’t eat anything unhealthy that day, I kept that promise. There was no excuse or reason that could change that because it was about personal integrity and keeping my word to myself.

Over the years, of course many things have changed in my life and in my fitness. My fitness goals have evolved. My workouts, my training intensity, and even my lifestyle priorities have shifted. That’s natural, and it’s part of growing older and adapting to new phases in life. But as I looked inward again, trying to rework a mindset rooted in discipline and purpose and asked myself what it was that kept me so in line with my decisions, I kept coming back to what worked before: just being a man of my word.

At its core, it is about cultivating mental resilience, building strong habits, and most importantly treating yourself with the same respect and honesty you offer others.